Tuesday, January 22, 2013

A Resume From The Desk Of A Genius



Today at work I was recruiting for a fairly high-level IT role that I had previously posted on CareerBuilder when I received the following resume in my inbox:

  

If you care about your future at all, please take a moment to compare this to your own resume or just go ahead and copy and paste that gem onto a blank Word document and use it as your own because that right there is GOLD, people. When I receive a resume of this caliber, I drop everything I am doing and call them immediately because as a great recruiter, I know this kind of candidate won’t be in the market long. 
 
Side note: I deleted the contact information but her name was not even capitalized which is how I knew this was the candidate for the job.

Me: Hello, this is Kasey and I just received your resume for the IT position you applied for and it looks absolutely perfect, is now a good time to talk? (Gosh, I’m so professional.)
Candidate: Yeah hi, I got time.
Me: Okay great, so tell me a little about your recent role there at… The call center? What company is that?
Candidate: (Company name), yeah I answer the phone and make sells.
Me: Yeah I see that, that’s perfect! So do you do any IT work there at all?
Candidate: IT???
Me: Yes, the role you applied for was an IT position… Technology?
Candidate: IT??? Yeah I got a computer.
Me: Perfect! Yeah, your resume looks great. Did you have any previous jobs before you were an “assistance?”
Candidate: Yeah I was a team lead at my last job and I was working in a call center before that.
Me: Okay, and why didn’t you include that on your resume?
Candidate: Oh I just didn’t.
Me: That makes sense, great! Well what pay rate are you looking for?
Candidate: Anything that don’t pay $10 dollars is fine with me.
Me: Well this pays $40/hr so I’m going to go ahead and send you over to my client if you are comfortable with that?
Candidate: Okay cool, thank you! I look forward to hearing back!



Will she get the job? I’m not a betting woman but if I were, I would say the odds are definitely in her favor.

(I apologize if that happens to be your resume - that’s just really bad luck on my part. On the other hand, I would be shocked if this candidate knew how to read.)

13 comments:

Natalie Hinkley said...

LOL, wow. I used to screen resumes for interview candidates at a job I had in college - boy do you get some interesting responses! I wonder how some people every got jobs in the first place!?

Ashley @ LocalPostcards said...

WOW. That's ridiculous!

Corin said...

"I answere the phones and make sells" haaaaaaaahhaa I'm in sales and I will 100% start using the term "I make sells." Cannot. Wait.

Suzanne Carillo Style Files said...

Egad. Sad really. Just sad.

Brandi Medrano said...

That is hilarious!! Kasey, I might know this person...I am from Corsicana... WONDERFUL resume'! haha

Veronica Lee Burns said...

hahaha this is hilarious!

Brenna said...

Bwahahaha!!! I needed to a good laugh today!

Ashleigh said...

This was effing awesome!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

LivingLikeLaLa said...

This is HILARIOUS!!! Love it!

Faith Bowyer said...

Hahaha... I have no words, except 'wow'.

Ameryn Marie said...

I die! That is gold right there! I think that alone would make me love your job! lol! I'm a new follower {I couldn't resist after reading this!}

Sarah said...

I just found your blog and this post is HILARIOUS!!!

Cortne Martin cocoinmagnolia said...

Oh...my...goodness....haaaalarious.